I haven't posted in a while. My life changed significantly over the last year, which is a blog post for a different day. Many days were a battle, and blogging just wasn't high on my priority list. In many ways last year was the most positive and successful year of my life. At the same time it was one of the worst. Unfortunately, the part of my life that took the biggest hit this last year was my teacher life. I had a tough year in the classroom. It took me longer than usual to connect with my students, and I think I will always remember this year for that reason. Right from the beginning I could tell I had a class with more needs (academically and socially) than an average class. I caved under the pressure of meeting those needs. Looking back now there are so many things I would have done differently.
First of all, I have always been a teacher who focuses on relationships. I work hard to get to know my students so I can serve them in whatever way they need. This year, I plowed through the unfamiliar curriculum instead of taking the time on those relationships. I was new to my district this year and there was no carry-over on any of the curricula. Math was different. Reading was different. Writing was different. Even science and social studies were different. I was starting all over (or at least I thought I was). I over-emphasized the importance of getting through the stuff, and my relationships crumbled. Every day took all the fight I had just to get through. It wasn't until April that I felt like I actually knew my students and they were beginning to know me. In March, my husband and I adopted our son, and I shared that moment with my students. At the same time, my students were doing Star of the Week so they were sharing their lives as well. Those two moments changed everything. Suddenly, I felt confident in the classroom again - I felt like I belonged. I'm pretty sure they felt the same way. As I shared such a huge life-changing moment with them, they were able to open up about their interests, passions, and lives, and I could feel everyone relax. I wish I could go back in time and spend the first couple of weeks really getting to know my students. The year would have gone differently.
Secondly, my passion for teaching reading didn't shine through this year. I devoted my fifth year of teaching to teaching my students to love reading - to love books. As I told one of my team members this last year, I was on fire that year and that fire burned brightly. This year, I lost that. As I mentioned before, I was overwhelmed by the curriculum. I never strayed too far from it out of fear of my students missing out on something important. I attempted to come out of the gate strong. I started Daily 5 with my students on the first day of school. We discussed, at length, the urgency of spending time reading every day for the first couple of weeks of school. Then I fizzled. There was just too much other stuff to get through, so I dragged them all along with me as I worked to figure it out. We didn't celebrate books. We didn't share books. We didn't recommend books to each other. We just slogged our way through the day. Now, most of my students loved Daily 5 time anyway, which I'm grateful for. They would complain if we didn't do it. I know it could have been more meaningful for them, though. I could have set them up for long-lasting success. The curriculum can wait a bit.
Lastly, I had a terrible attitude. On top of starting this job in a new district, I was attempting to handle being a new foster mom. There's so much I can say about the foster care life, but that would be a post (or 20) all on its own. For now, I'll suffice it to say, it's hard. There were many days I was just seconds away from bursting into tears, so I did what I've always done - used my classroom, my students, and my school as an escape. During those school hours, I worked hard to forget I was a foster parent. I was mostly successful at this. There was a constant under currant though. The stress, the worry, and the fear of the unknown was always there whether I acknowledged it or not. It made me irritable, even against my greatest efforts to not let it do that. Turns out, there is only so much I can handle with grace. When I reach my limit, I can be a bit of a grouch. I've spent a good portion of my summer reflecting on this and praying for more strength, patience, and understanding next year. Foster care is still hard - having a year of experience under my belt doesn't change that. I do know more about how it all works, and, with enough prayer, maybe this year my threshold for stress, worry, and fear can be just a little bit higher.
In March, I sat in my principal's office just before his second observation of me with tears streaming down my face. I told him I felt like a disappointment. I felt like I had failed to be the teacher I promised I would be in my interview. He kindly smiled at me and assured me I hadn't disappointed anyone. When I look at the data from the year, my students made excellent growth. Most of them met the goals laid out for them in our various standards, and I feel they are ready for second grade. I find comfort in that knowledge. It was a rough year, but it wasn't fruitless. My goal now is to learn from last year, make some improvements, and be that much more better next year. I think I can do it!
Showing posts with label Passion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Passion. Show all posts
Friday, July 8, 2016
Sunday, October 12, 2014
Why I Chose to Not Use AR
Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted. Writing another blog post has been on my mind for quite some time, but I just couldn't get myself to share anything. After some deep reflection, I realized I just wasn't feeling very passionate about what was happening in my classroom. Sure, good things were happening. We've been using our technology a little more everyday, and the students are growing in many ways. The things that were happening just felt very ordinary to me. This last week changed my mindset completely.
(Before I share what sparked my passion, please know that I don't mean to offend anyone. It needs to be okay for educators to feel differently about instructional practices - that's what makes each one of us so valuable. I appreciate differing opinions as opportunities to grow in my own abilities.)
The school I teach in uses Accelerated Reader (AR) to supplement its literacy instruction from first grade through eighth grade. As the year has progressed the other first grade classes have started identifying reading levels, choosing matching books, and taking daily tests. My coworkers were gently reminding me to get started with my students whenever the topic came up. I kept pushing it off and making excuses about how I was struggling to keep up with teaching a new grade level. I finally worked up the courage to confront my actual reason for putting AR off last Monday.
After researching the philosophy behind AR and looking at research on its results, I began to identify pros and cons and to formulate a plan. I wrote an email (a book might be a better way to describe it) to my principal late Monday night. In it, I shared my real reason for not starting AR: I don't believe it's in the best interest of my students.
Personally, I did AR all through elementary and middle school. It did weird things to my reading habits. I stopped seeing books as opportunities to learn, explore, and question and started seeing them as the point value they held. In 7th grade, I read over 300 points in order to get a trophy. I was a good reader, but I didn't enjoy what I was doing. It was just another job - another way to earn a good grade. Plus, I really liked seeing my name at the top of the points board in Mr. Mitchel's classroom.
I'm not the only one with stories like this. My older brother, who still holds the record for number of points in a year at our middle school, read books way beyond his comprehension level to get the points he wanted. My husband got terrible grades, because he read the books he wanted to read instead of the books that had AR tests. My younger brothers struggled with reading, and trying to reach their point expectations was torture for them.
Their were other aspects of the program bothering me as well. I cringed at the idea of telling a student what color of book to choose from the library. When in life outside of school are we only able to select a book based on the color tab on its spine? That's not authentic. I value the idea of teaching students how to identify whether or not a book is a good fit for them. If a student is empowered with the skills to evaluate a book and judge whether he should read it, imagine what that can do for his reading level and self esteem. Not to mention the fact that students catch on to that color system pretty quickly. Having one student brag about what color he is reading to another student is not something I want to happen in my classroom.
As I was putting together my argument to not use AR in my classroom, one question was a part of each of my thoughts. Why do we read? I read to have fun. I read because I can experience places/events/people I wouldn't be able to experience otherwise. I read to learn. That's real life. I don't read to get a certain number of points. I don't read as a competition against my peers. Why would I ask my students do that? Once again, that's not authentic.
I sent my book email to my principal and prayed he would take it into consideration. The next morning, he emailed back wanting to set up a meeting to discuss other options. We planned for Thursday, so I spent Tuesday and Wednesday nights putting together a document with details on how I was going to build readers in my classroom without using AR. I'll go into those details in future posts. For now, I want to focus on his reaction. As we sat down, he told a story about a conversation that happened around his dinner table earlier that week. One of his kids, who was reading a Diary of a Wimpy Kid book, sat down and said, "I need to finish this books so I can get my points." What ensued was a family conversation about why we really read and what's important with reading. His story is exactly why I was struggling to ask my students to do AR. Needless to say, after a good 25/30 minutes of conversation, my principal was on board and gave me the okay to continue with my plans.
I went back to my classroom, and that afternoon I shared my plans with my students. After some assurance on my part, the students started to feel excited too. It was a little harder for the students who have older siblings who have done AR for a few years to come to grasp with not earning points. I understand that; it would be hard to see other people receiving awards while they are not. This lead to one of the best conversations we have had together all year. When one of my kiddos said, "Well, ****** already has 10 points." I knew that was my opportunity to talk about why we read. Together, we brainstormed all the different reasons we read. We talked about how important it is to get better at reading and how the best way to do that is to read and read and read. By the end of that conversation, one of my little critics looked at my assistant and said, "I think this is going to be better than AR!"
I have a lot to do to build this up, and I'm not sure what criticisms I'm going to get as a result of this decision. What I do know is that I'm teaching with my heart. I'm sticking up for what I believe is right for my students.
(Before I share what sparked my passion, please know that I don't mean to offend anyone. It needs to be okay for educators to feel differently about instructional practices - that's what makes each one of us so valuable. I appreciate differing opinions as opportunities to grow in my own abilities.)
The school I teach in uses Accelerated Reader (AR) to supplement its literacy instruction from first grade through eighth grade. As the year has progressed the other first grade classes have started identifying reading levels, choosing matching books, and taking daily tests. My coworkers were gently reminding me to get started with my students whenever the topic came up. I kept pushing it off and making excuses about how I was struggling to keep up with teaching a new grade level. I finally worked up the courage to confront my actual reason for putting AR off last Monday.
After researching the philosophy behind AR and looking at research on its results, I began to identify pros and cons and to formulate a plan. I wrote an email (a book might be a better way to describe it) to my principal late Monday night. In it, I shared my real reason for not starting AR: I don't believe it's in the best interest of my students.
Personally, I did AR all through elementary and middle school. It did weird things to my reading habits. I stopped seeing books as opportunities to learn, explore, and question and started seeing them as the point value they held. In 7th grade, I read over 300 points in order to get a trophy. I was a good reader, but I didn't enjoy what I was doing. It was just another job - another way to earn a good grade. Plus, I really liked seeing my name at the top of the points board in Mr. Mitchel's classroom.
I'm not the only one with stories like this. My older brother, who still holds the record for number of points in a year at our middle school, read books way beyond his comprehension level to get the points he wanted. My husband got terrible grades, because he read the books he wanted to read instead of the books that had AR tests. My younger brothers struggled with reading, and trying to reach their point expectations was torture for them.
Their were other aspects of the program bothering me as well. I cringed at the idea of telling a student what color of book to choose from the library. When in life outside of school are we only able to select a book based on the color tab on its spine? That's not authentic. I value the idea of teaching students how to identify whether or not a book is a good fit for them. If a student is empowered with the skills to evaluate a book and judge whether he should read it, imagine what that can do for his reading level and self esteem. Not to mention the fact that students catch on to that color system pretty quickly. Having one student brag about what color he is reading to another student is not something I want to happen in my classroom.
As I was putting together my argument to not use AR in my classroom, one question was a part of each of my thoughts. Why do we read? I read to have fun. I read because I can experience places/events/people I wouldn't be able to experience otherwise. I read to learn. That's real life. I don't read to get a certain number of points. I don't read as a competition against my peers. Why would I ask my students do that? Once again, that's not authentic.
I sent my book email to my principal and prayed he would take it into consideration. The next morning, he emailed back wanting to set up a meeting to discuss other options. We planned for Thursday, so I spent Tuesday and Wednesday nights putting together a document with details on how I was going to build readers in my classroom without using AR. I'll go into those details in future posts. For now, I want to focus on his reaction. As we sat down, he told a story about a conversation that happened around his dinner table earlier that week. One of his kids, who was reading a Diary of a Wimpy Kid book, sat down and said, "I need to finish this books so I can get my points." What ensued was a family conversation about why we really read and what's important with reading. His story is exactly why I was struggling to ask my students to do AR. Needless to say, after a good 25/30 minutes of conversation, my principal was on board and gave me the okay to continue with my plans.
I went back to my classroom, and that afternoon I shared my plans with my students. After some assurance on my part, the students started to feel excited too. It was a little harder for the students who have older siblings who have done AR for a few years to come to grasp with not earning points. I understand that; it would be hard to see other people receiving awards while they are not. This lead to one of the best conversations we have had together all year. When one of my kiddos said, "Well, ****** already has 10 points." I knew that was my opportunity to talk about why we read. Together, we brainstormed all the different reasons we read. We talked about how important it is to get better at reading and how the best way to do that is to read and read and read. By the end of that conversation, one of my little critics looked at my assistant and said, "I think this is going to be better than AR!"
I have a lot to do to build this up, and I'm not sure what criticisms I'm going to get as a result of this decision. What I do know is that I'm teaching with my heart. I'm sticking up for what I believe is right for my students.
Wednesday, August 6, 2014
Finding Passion in DC
Kyle and I just returned from our first trip to Washington DC. This trip served dual purposes: one to see as much as we could, the other to visit and spend time with my husband's best friend, also named Kyle, and his wife, Shannon. Our friends are spending the summer in Bethesda, Maryland while he interns with the government. We landed in Baltimore around noon on Thursday. Kyle and Shannon picked us up at the airport and we grabbed a bite to eat. Then we headed to their home for the summer so we could drop off our things and plan the next few days.
We decided to stay in the Bethesda area for the rest of the day, and I'm so, so grateful we did. Shannon mentioned she had heard good things about taking a tour of Clara Barton's home in Glen Echo, so we decided to make the short drive there to do just that. Clara Barton is the founder of the American Red Cross and her Glen Echo home served as its headquarters starting in 1897. While I was there, I was introduced to two people who let their passions drive their lives. I couldn't help but think of my incoming first graders. I hope I can help them begin to identify their passions so they might make a difference in the way these two people have.
First of all, I was introduced to Clara Barton. I had heard her name, and I knew she was famous for her work as a nurse during the Civil War. That was the extent of my knowledge of her until I set foot in her home. What I had no idea about was how passionate Clara was about helping others. She knew she had gifts to offer, especially in times of disaster, and she challenged many thoughts at the time about what women should and shouldn't do. She not only served as a nurse during the Civil War, but she used that strong desire to help others to start the American Red Cross. Also, she used her passion for the things she was doing to give lectures to all kinds of audiences in the hopes of inspiring more people to step up and help. That's amazing!
Secondly, I met our tour guide, Kevin. He was by far the greatest tour guide we had during the trip, because I could tell he was doing something he loved. Kevin let us take the last tour of the day even though we got there about five minutes late. (We didn't show up late on purpose. We just didn't know about the timed tours.) We were the only people in the group, and he treated us as I imagine he would treat a group of important officials. He knew Clara Barton. He could answer any question we had, and I could see and feel his respect for her and her home. He spoke of many of the hardships Clara had to battle (e.g. starting the first public school in New Jersey but not being allowed to be principal because she was a woman) and it was almost as if his heart broke each time. About halfway through the tour, I realized how passionate he was about the history in that building and what it meant to our country and I found myself close to tears.
Clara and Kevin were certainly not the only passionate people I met during this trip. Our tour guide at the Capitol building was pretty incredible too, one of the rangers outside the Lincoln Memorial was able to answer all of our questions, and the ranger inside Ford's Theater was passionately answering questions about Lincoln's death and the moments leading up to it. In all of them, I could feel their love for what they were doing, and it made a significant impact on me.
I want to be Kevin for my students. I want them to see my passion for learning and to be inspired by it. More importantly, I want to help them identify their own passions and share those passions with the world around them. In a sense, I want them to be little Kevins. My hope is for my classroom to be so much more than reading and writing and math and science; I want it to be a place where my students can come to explore their world. While I will certainly push to meet standards, I don't want them to be the focus. I don't want to get lost in the world of numbers and percentages. My students are people with real thoughts and feelings, and I want to respect them in every way I can. My trip to DC was unlike any trip I had taken before. It was filled with wonder and learning, and I want to duplicate that in my classroom.
We decided to stay in the Bethesda area for the rest of the day, and I'm so, so grateful we did. Shannon mentioned she had heard good things about taking a tour of Clara Barton's home in Glen Echo, so we decided to make the short drive there to do just that. Clara Barton is the founder of the American Red Cross and her Glen Echo home served as its headquarters starting in 1897. While I was there, I was introduced to two people who let their passions drive their lives. I couldn't help but think of my incoming first graders. I hope I can help them begin to identify their passions so they might make a difference in the way these two people have.
Kyle and I outside Clara Barton's home.
First of all, I was introduced to Clara Barton. I had heard her name, and I knew she was famous for her work as a nurse during the Civil War. That was the extent of my knowledge of her until I set foot in her home. What I had no idea about was how passionate Clara was about helping others. She knew she had gifts to offer, especially in times of disaster, and she challenged many thoughts at the time about what women should and shouldn't do. She not only served as a nurse during the Civil War, but she used that strong desire to help others to start the American Red Cross. Also, she used her passion for the things she was doing to give lectures to all kinds of audiences in the hopes of inspiring more people to step up and help. That's amazing!
Secondly, I met our tour guide, Kevin. He was by far the greatest tour guide we had during the trip, because I could tell he was doing something he loved. Kevin let us take the last tour of the day even though we got there about five minutes late. (We didn't show up late on purpose. We just didn't know about the timed tours.) We were the only people in the group, and he treated us as I imagine he would treat a group of important officials. He knew Clara Barton. He could answer any question we had, and I could see and feel his respect for her and her home. He spoke of many of the hardships Clara had to battle (e.g. starting the first public school in New Jersey but not being allowed to be principal because she was a woman) and it was almost as if his heart broke each time. About halfway through the tour, I realized how passionate he was about the history in that building and what it meant to our country and I found myself close to tears.
Clara and Kevin were certainly not the only passionate people I met during this trip. Our tour guide at the Capitol building was pretty incredible too, one of the rangers outside the Lincoln Memorial was able to answer all of our questions, and the ranger inside Ford's Theater was passionately answering questions about Lincoln's death and the moments leading up to it. In all of them, I could feel their love for what they were doing, and it made a significant impact on me.
Standing beside the Washington Monument
Just outside the Capitol
I want to be Kevin for my students. I want them to see my passion for learning and to be inspired by it. More importantly, I want to help them identify their own passions and share those passions with the world around them. In a sense, I want them to be little Kevins. My hope is for my classroom to be so much more than reading and writing and math and science; I want it to be a place where my students can come to explore their world. While I will certainly push to meet standards, I don't want them to be the focus. I don't want to get lost in the world of numbers and percentages. My students are people with real thoughts and feelings, and I want to respect them in every way I can. My trip to DC was unlike any trip I had taken before. It was filled with wonder and learning, and I want to duplicate that in my classroom.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Exploring My Passions
After hearing so many wonderful things about Dave Burgess's Teach Like a Pirate, I quickly ordered it on my Kindle around the end of June. I am so thankful I did. If there has ever been a book that challenged me to better myself, this was that book. The ideas in this book are fresh and forced me to think in all kinds of different ways about the way I was teaching.
I blogged about my thoughts on immersion here, but today, I wanted to share some of my passions. Dave breaks passion down into three categories: content passion, professional passion, and personal passion. Thinking about my passions in these three different categories surprised me in so many ways and I learned a lot about myself in doing so. (That's why it took me so long to blog about it. :) )
I blogged about my thoughts on immersion here, but today, I wanted to share some of my passions. Dave breaks passion down into three categories: content passion, professional passion, and personal passion. Thinking about my passions in these three different categories surprised me in so many ways and I learned a lot about myself in doing so. (That's why it took me so long to blog about it. :) )
Content Passion - What do I love to teach?
My ultimate passion when it comes to content is teaching about books. I took a class on Daily 5 and Cafe at the beginning of the summer, and I am itching to get into the classroom and put all of my new-found knowledge to work. Putting books into the hands of children and teaching them how to use them (both to gain knowledge and for pleasure) puts that spring in my step. With teaching reading, I am constantly challenging myself as a teacher and trying to find the best way to meet my students' needs. This is important to me as a teacher.
There are a couple of science/social studies topics that keep me going throughout the year too. I love, love, love to teach about the ocean! My husband and I went to Hawaii on our honeymoon, and my eyes were opened up to a whole new world. Having lived in (very much) land-locked Iowa my entire life and never seeing the ocean before our trip, I had no idea of its beauty and mystery. While in Hawaii, I had the opportunity to go on a submarine trip. At the deepest depth, we were 128 ft. below sea level. We saw all kinds of amazing creatures and habitats. It was fantastic! I love creating all kinds of beach/ocean-like experiences for my students. (Like this one!) I think I come alive when I'm teaching about these topics.
Another topic that puts the extra bounce in my step is farm. I grew up on a dairy farm. At times, we also had pigs, sheep, and chickens on our farm. As a kid, my life revolved around milking the cows, making the hay, immunizing the pigs, and feeding the calves. My dad loves to tell the story of the three year old me who was desperate to watch him milk the cows in the middle of the winter. After getting all bundled up and getting me to the barn, I think I lasted about 15 minutes before I was desperate to go back to the house. In my heart, the farm will always be my home. I love how naturally inquisitive my kiddos tend to be about the farm, and I love being a part of helping them experience the wonder of the farm.
Professional Passions - Why do I teach?
Three reasons:
- Watching students become great world citizens - There is so much more happening in my classroom than reading and math. Every day I have the joy of teaching students how to operate in the world. I teach about manners and kindness, and together, we work to better ourselves as people. This is why I teach. Nothing can make me smile bigger than hearing students share how kindness made a difference in their lives and how they plan to use that kindness in the future.
- Being there - I have very little clue as to what my students are dealing with outside of school. Some students are more open than others, of course, and I know that many of them are dealing with things adults struggle with. For this reason, I teach to provide as safe place for my students. I challenge myself to take the time to love each and every child in my classroom and to make sure that their time with me is as caring and worry-free as it can be.
- Connecting and inspiring greatness - I want my students to know that there is more to this world than what is inside our four walls. I want them to know that what we are learning, doing, and creating within those four walls is important to everyone outside of those walls. I teach to inspire my students to be great and to explore their own passions to create something awesome. Then, I teach to create ways for them to share their passions with the world. I want them to be great, and I want the world to know it!
Personal Passions - What do I love outside of teaching?
Anyone who knows me well knows that I cannot turn down a sweet to save my life. (This is the reason why I run.) For this reason, baking is one of my all-time favorite things to do. I recently tweeted this picture of the cake I made for my birthday. Let me tell ya', that thing tasted even better than it looked! I also make some dang good cinnamon rolls. My husband frequently requests them, and they have become a Christmas morning staple for both of our families.
Another personal passion I have is books. Most Saturdays during the school year involve hours of losing myself in a good book. I won't disclose how much time I spend reading in the summertime. It's quite embarrassing. It's a good thing I am very conscious of our budget, because if that wasn't the case, I'm certain a huge percentage of our monthly income would go toward new books. Instead, I make weekly trips to the library and delight in rereading my favorites. I'm currently working my way through the Harry Potter series again, and I'm just as excited about them now as I was when I first read them.
Now that I have identified all of my passions, I need to determine how I'm going to use them in my classroom. There's no doubt that I'm looking at this year in a completely different light than I did before. I'm hoping to focus on engagement and planning with my students in mind. After taking a few weeks off of school (although it is really hard to completely detach myself from school), I'm finally ready to get back and I'm so excited to see where this year takes me and my students!
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